hadaka no tsukiai 裸の付き合い
The "companions of nudity"
We know the passion of the Japanese for the bath and it seems that their habit of going to relax in hot springs has recently "contaminated" foreign tourists. But if the latter often feel embarrassed to find themselves naked in front of strangers or their traveling companions, the Japanese have always taken advantage of these moments of relaxation to establish new relationships or deepen old ones. This is called in Japanese hadaka no tsukiai.
Nudity does not pose a problem for the Japanese and it has never been condemned by the Shinto or Buddhist religions of Japan. Since the dawn of time, the Japanese have shared the many hot springs with which their country is endowed. Then, at the time of Edo (1603-1868) the public baths made the happiness of the townspeople, they were mixed. Since the houses and apartments are equipped with bathroom, the bath is taken as a family . It is a great moment of relaxation and communication. Young children generally bathe with their father and once older, girls join their mother in the family bath. We discuss, we laugh, we share moments of family happiness.
To read: Ofuro, the bath in Japan
Sentô: good neighborly relations
The sentô , public baths , have therefore seen their clientele drastically reduced, but some elderly people still frequent them assiduously. This is an opportunity for them to meet up with long-time neighbours, to strengthen ties, to hear from them or share the latest gossip, to talk about themselves, too. Of its small or great evils, of its problems or its joys. The rare opportunity to indulge in confidences... This is what the expression " hadaka no tsukiai" essentially means . A "naked friendship" , freed from all the constraints imposed by Japanese society, far from the restraint that characterizes the Japanese people.
Beginnings can be difficult, however, for anyone entering a public bath for the first time. The regulars have their favorite places and their designated contacts. Entering this restricted space, ultimately more "private" than public, where everyone knows each other, is like arriving at a small party where you have not been invited . We can sometimes feel like an intruder. Custom dictates that the newcomer does everything possible not to get in the way and takes the least comfortable places (for example, when washing while sitting on a small stool, the one near the front door, exposed to drafts). To strike up a conversation, the best way is still to talk about the bath, to lighten the mood. Gradually, if you regularly return to the sentô, you will then be accepted and you will be able to make friends.
Bath at Mikawaya Ryokan, Kanagawa Prefecture
JNTO
The onsen: relaxation and sincerity
Onsen (hot spring) baths are different. We go there during a weekend or vacation, to relax . We go there with family, friends or even colleagues. For a Westerner, it may seem embarrassing to find themselves naked in front of their office colleagues and even sometimes their superior. For the Japanese, on the contrary, it is an opportunity to talk about everything and nothing, but also to deepen relationships and often to show more sincerity . Here again, it's a privileged moment to confide in each other... The expression "to get naked" finds all its value in Japanese baths! Stripped of his clothes, which in Japan often reveal professional status, the uniform still being often worn in the office; you can let yourself go in the heat and the vapors of the onsen . There is no more hierarchy, no more differences, no more barriers. Everyone finds themselves in their simplest device and sincerity is essential. It is also easier to talk to strangers who share the same bath and the same goal: to relax.
See also: Onsen, a short guide to good manners
The social value of communal baths
Japanese sociologists believe that the custom of bathing together promotes "social mixing" . Author of a book on sentô , Shinobu Machida, he is full of praise for the "social value of communal baths". According to him, there is something about sentō that has been lost everywhere else in modern Japanese society. And to declare: “When you soak in a bath, it melts the hardness of your heart and softens your emotions, it facilitates the smile in each individual. It is the beginning of an exchange, of a contact. Even though the people may never see each other again, it can be a moment of heart-to-heart communication. »
